Hình ảnh trang
PDF
ePub

204

DEPENDING ON OTHERS.

'Shane, you've an

May be I have,' 'How so,' says I.

comes in here, quite innocent-like: eye to squire's new lodge,' says he. says I. 'I'm your man,' says he. 'Sure I'm as good as married to my lady's maid,' said he; ‘and I'll spake to the squire for you my own self. ‘The blessing be about you,' says I, quite grateful, and we took a strong cup on the strength of it, and depinding on him, I thought all safe; and what d'ye think, my lady? Why, himself stalks into the place, talked the squire over, to be sure, and without so much as 'by your lave,' sates himself and his new wife on the lase in the house; and I may go whistle.' 'It was a great pity, Shane, that you did not go yourself to Mr. Churn.' 'That's a true word for you, ma'am dear; but it's hard if a poor man can't have a frind to depind

on.""

If you want any thing well done, you must see to it yourself. If you want it half done, leave it to servants If you want it neglected, impose it upon your friend, to save yourself the trouble.

CHAPTER XXI.

CHOICE OF SOCIETY, AND FORMATION OF FRIENDSHIPS.

life.

HARACTER is formed under a great variety of influences. Sometimes a very trifling circumstance gives direction to the whole course of one's

And every incident that occurs, from day to day, is exerting a silent, gradual influence, in the formation of your character. Among these influences, none are more direct and powerful than that exerted upon us by the companions with whom we associate; for we insensibly fall into their habits. This is especially true in childhood and youth, when the character is plastic, like soft wax, easily impressed.

But we cannot avoid associating, to some extent, with those whose influence is injurious. It is necessary, then, for us to distinguish society into general and particular. General society is that with which we are compelled to associate. Particular society is that which we choose for ourselves. In school, and in all public places, you are under the necessity of associating somewhat with all. But those whom you meet, in such circumstances, you are not compelled to make intimate friends. You may be courteous and polite to all, wherever and whenever you meet them, and yet maintain such a prudent reserve, and cautious

206

INTIMATE FRIENDSHIPS.

deportment, as not to be much exposed to contamination, if they should not prove suitable companions.

But every one needs intimate friends; and it is necessary that these should be well chosen. A bad friend may prove your ruin. You should therefore be slow and cautious in the formation of intimacies and friendships. Do not be suddenly taken with any one, and so enter into a hasty friendship; for you may be mistaken, and soon repent of it. There is much force in the old adage, “All is not gold that shines.” A pleasing exterior often conceals a corrupt heart. Before you enter into close intimacies or friendships, study the characters of the persons whom you propose to choose for companions. Watch their behaviour and conversation; and if you discover any bad habits indulged, or any thing that indicates a want of principle, let them not become your companions. If you discover that they disregard any of the commandments of God, set them down as unsafe associates. They will not only be sure to lead you astray, but you can place no dependence upon their fidelity. If they will break one of God's commands, they will another; and you can put no confidence in them. But even where you discover no such thing, ask the opinion of your parents respecting them before you choose them as your friends. Yet, while you are in suspense about the matter, treat them courteously and kindly. But when you have determined to seek their friendship, do not impose your friendship on them against their will. Remember that they have the same right as yourself to the choice of their friends; and they may see some objection to the formation of a friendship with yourself. Be delicate, therefore, in your advances, and give them an opportunity to come half way. A friendship cautiously and slowly formed will

FORMATION OF FRIENDSHIPS.

207

be much more likely to last than one that is formed in haste.

But let the number of your intimate and confidential friends be small. It is better to have a few select, choice, and warm friends, than to have a great number, less carefully chosen, whose attachment is less warm and ardent. But you must not refuse to associate at all with the mass of the society where you belong; especially, if you live in the country. You must meet them kindly and courteously, on all occasions where the society in general in which you move is called together. You must not affect exclusiveness, nor confine yourself to the company of your particular friends, at such times. But be careful that you do not expose yourself to evil influences.

You ought not, at present, to form any intimate friendships with the other sex. Such friendships, at your age, are dangerous; and if not productive of any serious present evils, they will probably be subjects of regret when you come to years of maturity; for attachments may be formed that your judgment will then disapprove.

CHAPTER XXII.

T

BAD COMPANY: MISCHIEVOUSNESS.

HERE are some boys, who carelessly go any where that they can find amusement, without regard to the character of their company. They not only associate indiscriminately in general society, where they are obliged to go, as at school; but they seek the company of bad boys, or permit themselves to be enticed into it, because it affords them some momentary enjoyment.

A bad boy is one who has a bad disposition, which has never been subdued; or one of corrupt principles and bad habits. A boy with a bad disposition will be rough, quarrelsome, malicious in his temper, fond of mischief, and rude and unmannerly in his general behaviour. A boy of corrupt principles is one who will not scruple to break the commands of God, when they stand in the way of his own gratification. He acts from the mere selfish desire of present enjoyment. A boy of bad habits is one who is in the habit of disobeying his parents, breaking the Sabbath, using bad language, lying, stealing, gaming, drinking, or doing wanton mischief. Any of these habits shows a character thoroughly corrupt.

If you go into the company of persons that are sick with the measles, hooping-cough, small-pox, or any

« TrướcTiếp tục »