every breaft, he reignsevery-where. There's ne er a mother's fon between this and the Antipodes, from beardlefs fixteen up to grey beard fixty, who has not ftruggled at fome period of his life in the Cytherian net, and confeffed the power of the blind god. But let them defcribe the impulfes that push them forward into the fnare, and you will find they have worhipped fome other deity than real love; fome ufurper, who has borrowed his name and authority. From the beginning it has been fo, and to the end it will continue fo; for the prefent age, with all its refinements, is more diftant from the knowledge of real love, than were our forefathers of the fifth century. It would be an amusing study to a fpeculative mind, to obferve how this fafcinating fomething has played upon the folly and invention of mankind through all ages. It has exhibited its pranks and whimfies in a thoufand different fcenes, and, in every fhape that vanity or fancy could devife, has paid its addreffes to the heart. Love is the Proteus of heaven: and, had the ancients known the full extent of his qualities, and feen what we have feen, no doubt they had given him the proper attributes of that character. But of all the artillery which love has employed to brighten eyes, and foften hearts, the most effectual and forcible is the Modern Novel. Of all the arrows which Cupid has fhot at youthful hearts this is the keeneft. There is no refifting it. It is the literary opium, that lulls every fenfe into delicious rapture; and, refpecting the bias of a young lady's mind, one may venture to turn out the Nobles and Robfons with half a dozen of their greafy combuftible duodecimo's, againft the nurfe, the mother, and the Common-prayer- Boskaye, and they would conquer them too. Thefe gentlemen are real patriots, never-failing friends to the propagation of the human fpecies. They have counterated all the defigns of the British senate against matrimony; and, in contempt of the marriage act, poft chaifes and young couples run smoothly on the north road. All this, and more, we owe to novels, which have operated like electricity on the great national body, and have raifed the humble fpirit of citizens to a parallel with the veriest romp of quality in the coterie. But what 'charms all ranks of people in these productions is the manner.-Unrestrained bythatdifgufting fimplicity, that timid coynefs, which checked the fancies of former ages, the modern mufes are ftark naked, and it were no vague affertion to declare, that they have contributed more than any other cause to debauch the morals of the young of the fair fex. Novels, according to the practice of the times, are the powerful engines withwhich the feducer attacks the female heart; and, if we judge from every day's experience, his plots are feldom laid in vain. Never was there an apter weapon for fo black a purpose. Tricked out in the trapping of tafte, a loose and airy dihabille, with a ftaggering gait and a wanton eye, the modern mufe trips jauntily on, the true child of fashion and folly. By tickling the ear, fhe approaches the heart, and foon ruins it; for, like all other proftitutes, fhe is plaufible and in finuating, finuating, and has her winning ways." A wretched levity of thought, delivered at random in an incoherent ftyle, paffes current for fentiment; and fo alertly has this mental jargon played its part, that our young ladies begin to throw out Steele and Addifon to make room for H-- and De Vergy. An ingenious author of this age has given us in a few lines the following admirable receipt to make a modern novel: Take a subject that's grave, with a moral that's good, Throw in all the temptations that virtue withstood; And pray let your hero be hand fome and young, Tafte, wit and fine fentiment flow from his tongue; And his delicate feelings be fure. to improve With paffion, with tender foft rapture, and love. Add fome incidents too, which I like above measure, Such as those I have read, are efteem'd as a treasure In a book that's entitled-The Woman of Pleasure ; Mix well, and you'll find 'twill a novel produce Fit for modeft young ladies-to keep it for use. To do justice to the bard, he has chalked out the outlines verygrace. fully, and justly defcribed the ingredients for making this literary pill operate against morality. But, left any reader fhould mistake the author's meaning, here follows a letter, worked up to the very humour of the times, and ftamped with the true current mark and fignature of 1772. It is fraught with ftyle, manner, and fentiment; and the next worthy gentlemen, who gives a three-guinea novel in two volumes, is welcome to infert it his work. LETTER XVI. Lady Juliana Glanville to Mifs Henrietta Wentworth. Heigho! Wentworth! whowould have thought it?-What a foolish thing is a fond fluttering heart! How often have you told me what a metal mine was made of!--Hard as it was, O'Brien's eyes have melted it-The dear youth faw and conquered Your friend is no longer free-O the dear enchanting fcenes around Glanville caftle, that once delighted my innocent hours -Ye lowering forefts-myrtle fhades-crystal ftreans and cooing turtles-ye have no more charms for me-none — unless O'Brien be there. Rocks from your caves repeat the plaintive ftrains, And let the mournful tale be echo'd o'er the plains. -And fo, my dear, I'll tell you how it was I went last night to the Grove affembly, in company with the Mifs Seymours and that fright Bluffton. By the bye, my dear, is not that fellow a dreadful creature?-huge and horrid-how I hate him!-So, my dear, as I was faying, we all went together I dreffed in my white fattin and filver, and my hair pinned up with my new Barbelot's brilliant-a-propos-how do you like my laft fuit of Bruffels?-And, juft as we were going to cross the ftyle, whom fhould I fee peeping in on the other fide fide of the hedge, but-O'Brien! lovely and enchanting as he was when I faw him laft winter at Carlifle-houfe!-Jinftantly feigned illness, and turned up the lane to return; when O'Brien, with an angel'sfwiftnefs flew over the hedge -and we both diffolved in tears.O! fweet fenfibility! why was my heart formed with more than woman's fottnefs! why was 'Brien formed with more than manly grace! It was in a bower compofed of honeyfuckles and jellamine that we reclined-The dear youth fpoke a thousand tender things with his eyes, and I anfwered him with fighs and with bluthes -Seated in a deep embowering fhade-lips trembling-hearts beating-locked in each other's arms--what a dangerous fituation! and the difcourfe on love! And Oh! his charming tongue Was but too well acquainted with my weakness! He talked of love, and all my meiting heart Diffolv'd within my breast. Do you know, Wentworth, that I was violently inclined to play the fool? We found ourselves lavishing encomiums on difinterested love and a cottage. His defcription was animated to the last degree. My whole attention was engroffed. He held my hand, tenderly preffed between his, while I listened to his foothing tale. His eyes were ftill more eloquent than his bewitching tongue. I was almost a loft woman; when, fortunately for me, the idea of fqualling brats, and matrimonial bitters, darted across my thoughts. Up I fprang. A fine day for a walk, cried I; and away I tripped. I had nothing for it but flight. He followed me, dejected, his arms folded. He looked amazingly handfome. But pru. dence kept her feat in my breaft: prudence, you know, is the foil of love. We ftrolled towards the houfe, without any other conversation, except expreffive fighs on his fide-half-ftifled ones and ftolen glances on mine. I flew to the harpfichord to roufe my fpirits. He drew a chair near me; and, leaning on the instrument, fixed his languishing eyes on my face. My fingers involuntarily touched soft plaintive notes. Inftead of a fprightly air, out came a ditty, as melancholy as The babes in the wood.' He perceived my fwimming eyes he perceived my confufion; and, fnatching the moment of love, he threw himself on his knees, looked moving, and fwore that, While youthful fplendor lighten'd in my eyes, Clear as the fmiling glory of the skies, More white than flax my curling treffes flow'd, My dimpled checks with rofy beauty glow'd. Enchanting lines! are not they, Wentworth-Well! and what followed?-you ask me. - Ay, there's the rub-but pofitively you fhan't know till my next letter.Heigh-ho! Adieu,Henrietta-and tell me how your affair with the baronet goes on-Adieu, my dear, and remember your fighing, and almoft ruined coufin, JULIANA GLANVILLE, What What effect fuch graceless raptures and broken periods may produce on untutored minds, let ten thoufand boarding-fchools witnefs. This contagion is the more to be dreaded, as it daily fpreads through all ranks of people; and Mifs, the taylor's daughter, talks now as familiarly to her confident, Mifs Polly Staytape, of fwains and fentiments, as the accomplished dames of genteel life. In a word, if a man of fenfe has an inclination to chufe a rational woman for his wife, he reaches his grand climacteric before he can find a fair-one to truft himself with-fo univerfal is the corruption!-Thefe are the fatal confequences of novels! A Dream. By Voltaire. N February 18, 1763, the fun I fhall not take notice on what kind of thrones they were feated, nor how many millions of celeftial beings proftrated themselves before the immortal architect of the world, nor what multitudes of inhabitants of their refpective globes appeared before the judges: I fhall only attend to forne particular circumftances which ftruck me at that time. I obferved, that every dead perfon, who pleaded his caufe, had in attendance all the witnesses of his actions. For instance, when the Cardinal of Lorrain boafted, that he made the council of Trent adopt fome of his opinions, and demanded eternal life as the reward of his orthodoxy, twenty courtezans immediately appeared round him, bearing on their foreheads the number of their appointments with him. All thofe too, who were concerned with him in the 1763, thef, I infamous league, were at hand, all was tranflated to heaven, as all my friends very well know. I neither rode on Mahomet's mare, nor yet in the chariot of Elijah; I was neither carried on the elephant of Sommonocodom of the Siamfee, nor on the horse of St. George the patron of England, nor yet on St. Anthony's pig. I muft own that I went, I do not know how. I was, you may eafily fuppofe, aftonished; but, what you will not fo eafily fuppofe, I was a fpectator of the general judgment. The judges (and I hope you will not be offended whilft I name them) were the principal benefactors of mankind, Confucius, Solon, Socrates, Titus, Antoninus, Epictetus, all glorious men, who, having taught and practifed the virtues that God enjoins, feemed to have a natural right to pronounce his decrees. the accomplices of his wicked life. Close by Cardinal Lorrain sat John Calvin, who boasted, in his grofs language, that," he had given the papal idol á griper in the guts." I have written (faid he) against painting and fculpture. I have made it plainly appear, that the works of taste and art are good for nothing; and I have proved, that it is a devilish thing indeed to dance a minuet. Drive out this fame damned Cardinal, and place me next to St. Paul." Immediately, as he was fpeaking, a funeral pile appeared in flames. A dreadful fpectre darted from the middle of the fire, with the moft hideous fhrieks. Monfler, (it cried) execrable monster, tremble! Behold that Servetus whom you robbed of his life by the most hor rible rible tortures, merely because he had difputed with you concerning the mode in which three perfons could form one fubftance." The judges upon this, ordered, that Cardinal Lorrain fhould be thrown into the bottomlefs pit, but that Calvin fhould be referved for fome feverer punishment. I beheld a number of Fakeers, Talapoins, Bonzes, black, white, and grey friars, who all imagined, that to pay their court to the Supreme Being, it would be neceffary to fing and whip themfelves, or to go naked. When thefe wretches appeared, I heard a dreadful voice crying, "What good have you done to mankind?" This voice was followed by a folemn filence, no one daring to anfwer. At laft I heard the awful fentence of the Supreme Judge of the univerfe pronounced: "Be it known to the inhabitants of the millions of worlds we have been pleased to create, that we fhall never judge them by their opinions, but by their actions: for fuch is our juftice." This was the first time I had feen fuch an edit. All thofe I had read on that grain of fand which we inhabit, generally ended with, Such is our pleafure. The Man of Pleafure, Number IX. Nil eo contulerim jucundo fanus To the Man of Pleasure. SIR, T has been obferved by fome celebrated writer, that men IT would come into company with ten On the other hand, a profeffed wit is the most impertinent being on the face of the earth: he that is for ever laying a plan to lug in a conceit, deferves as conftantly to be lugged by the ears. If a jeft, or even a pun arifes from the con verfation, it will not be difagree. able, because it is natural; but the book-hunter, who ftrings them by the |